Today 6/12/09

So, here we are…and I really don’t think anything has change. It’s all the same, I am still terribly hurt and I can’t think straight sometimes. He is still trying to figure out stuff. I think this has been really hard on our son. He is very much like his Dad and keeps his feelings in. I told him that he needs to talk about what he is feeling. He told me a few days ago that he isn’t happy about this, he isn’t sad about this, he just doesn’t feel anything. He said he felt the same way at school, he didn’t feel anything. I think that is him really suppressing his feelings. I know when he was at school, it was the homesickness that he was suppressing. Now he is home and “all this” is going on, that again, he is really suppressing his feelings. I told him, that that he needs to talk to someone about it because it isn’t healthy to keep it all in. I told him, maybe we would not be where we are today if Dad had talked about his feelings. Dad is the same way and keeps a lot of it in. I hope he does talk to someone, me, his Dad, a friend… I want him to be okay. I know this will affect him but I want it to be with the least bit of damage as possible. I love my son so much and I feel so awful that he has to go through this.